Worry Less, Tawakkal More.

Barusan baca tentang pengalaman seorang niqabi Malaysia yang melawat Eropa (beberapa kota di UK dan Paris) untuk beberapa pekerjaan. Dia pergi ditemani ayahnya, yang baru pertama kali ini terbang ke Eropa. Orang tua ini awalnya khawatir, bahwa perjalanan ini akan sulit, beliau membayangkan orang-orang di Eropa sana pasti tidak suka dengan Muslim. Belum lagi berita-berita islamofobia yang banyak tersebar.
Tapi anaknya meyakinkan ia bahwa semua yang terjadi pasti kehendak Allah, tawakkal saja. Dan selama perjalanan mereka, hingga kembali ke Malaysia, tak ada satu pun hal buruk yang terjadi. Semua nya baik, mereka bertemu orang-orang baik, bahkan sempat menolong mereka di beberapa situasi. Dan wanita itu seorang niqabi dengan seorang ayah yang selalu pakai peci putih. Don't you feel amaze how Allah protect those who believe in Him, do you?
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Kejadian hampir mirip juga pernah terjadi dalam kehidupan ku sendiri. Awal-awal kepergian untuk studi lanjut dipenuhi dengan kerisauan orangtua. Siapa pula yang tak risau melepas anak gadisnya pergi ke tempat jauh, menetap di tempat belum pernah didatangi, dan dengan orang-orang yang sangat berbeda pula. Akan diterima kah dia di sana? Begitu mungkin pikir mereka. But then I said, this whole earth is belong to Allah. He won't leave me alone there, will He? Dan begitulah, selama tinggal di sana, tak ada satu kejadian buruk yang pernah diterima anak gadis itu lantaran ia berhijab. All was nice, super nice actually.
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Jadi, kekhawatiran yang kita buat dalam pikiran kita sebenarnya adalah kekurangpercayaan kita pada takdir Allah. Ikhtiarkan yang terbaik, kemudian tawakkal. Allah yang atur. Kamu tinggal yakin dan jalani saja.

Now and then

Now and then,
Many may have changed.
But for sure,
Some feelings and memories remain the same.
-Havwini, 2018-

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It has been widely said that you'll be grateful for the things you have left behind. I have to say that's greatly true. When I was a student, I was always hoping I could finish my degree as soon as possible. Student's life seemed really hard to face. Classes, assignments, projects, papers, part-time works. It's all about deadlines and they surely took over your whole time.

But you know what, today when I unintentionally read through papers I've written during my school day, I feel like
I do miss my student time. Very much.

Moments ago, when I was still waiting for some good news about the job, I also felt the same. Missed my school time. At that time, I thought it's easier to do many things at the same time than to do nothing but waiting. I was not complaining. I just feel a bit tired about having that kind of daily. Still being unemployed when you have a master degree is quite stressful, trust me. Especially when your collegues are all busy doing their job.

Lately, when I've already had something to do on my daily, I still miss my school time. The feeling remains the same. Should I be back to those student time? My soul screams, "Hell yeaaaah!" Alright, let's prepare the doctorate proposal! My other side sighs, "Oh, No!"

Whatever, I miss those time and wish I could have another "good" student time soon.

Oh, hey! This is the first post after a looooong time! Congrats, Self!